STOP DIGGING IF THE SAND IS SLIPPERY

(Long Post but Very Healing)

I have a saying that I share at S.O.P.E and it goes “EVERY FOUNDER HAS A VICE AND IT WON’T GO AWAY. HENCE THE NEED TO FIND A CO-FOUNDER WHO WILL CHECKMATE YOUR VICE.”

The best bet you have to being a wholesome person is THERAPY. And the best form of therapy is SELF THERAPY.

I subscribe to paying for therapy. I am a Therapist and I help tons of people with therapy; however, after all therapies received, YOU MUST APPLY YOURSELF TO THE TOOLS AND PROCEDURES FOR IT TO EFFECTIVELY HEAL YOU. That is where Self Therapy comes in.

When I knew my life was going on the wrong trajectory in 2012, I became curious. I was always asking myself “how can I change my life?” That’s how I found NLP by InnocentMINDS and I attended the certifications in 2014 and 2015. I attended NLP because I wanted to HEAL FROM INSIDE OUT. Immediately I experienced that course, my vices were so glaring to me.. and I knew what “Inner Work” to deploy to become the version of me that I knew as a young boy.

After a whole year of dissecting my learnings and playing out SCENARIO PLANNINGS, I came to the following audacious decisions:

1. If the death of my popularity is the beginning of my wholesomeness, I’ll give it up. As at 2016, I had become a household name in my spheres and it troubled me. I was about to take a very drastic decision and I may meant the end of “Sam Obafemi, The Emotional Intelligence & Anger Management Expert”. I chose the end of that identity for an uncertain “better”
2. I reminded myself what I said when I was leaving paid employment for self employment “Sam Obafemi, if it means starting all over again every time, we will do it”. I held on to that
3. I also reminded myself what I took as a lesson from The Alchemist in 2011; “For as long as I live, I will always find a way out. I will never be stranded”. I held on to that

These 3 key BELIEFS propelled me into acting on my therapies and TAKING MY LIFE BACK.

If you’ve followed my work since 2016, I have repeatedly said “MY BEST YEARS HAVE BEEN SINCE 2016”. I literally RECREATED my life and become BETTER at EVERYTHING. Still being better by the day.

Why am I sharing this?

I see many Founders and Coaches STRUGGLE with being WHOLE, HEALED & AUTHENTIC. We say one thing and do another thing; because we are afraid of being seen as inpostors or frauds. I felt so too. Imagine I am a Life Coach, a teacher of Emotional Intelligence and Anger Management yet I couldn’t get my life together. That was fraudulent; but I had to choose. Live like a fraud or fix up and be congruent? The risk was the same. It was only a matter of time.

Some of us are drowning in debt. Some are troubled and unhappy. Some are deeply disconnected from life and we’re just floating. Some are angry about everything and not sure how to move forward. Some are still battling upbringing and family distress. A lot of issues.

THIS MESSAGE IS TO FOUNDERS AND COACHES.

Please, whatever you need to do to heal and become whole, do it. NO LOOK ANYBODY FACE O. Do it for you.

I was called names. I was hated. I was threatened. I was harassed. I lost a lot of people I thought were believers. I lost so many things I believed I had earned… it hurt. It hurt A LOT but today, I am CONGRUENT IN THE CENTRE OF MY MISSION. I have GROWN for me and I am ASPIRING for me. I told my children “I am NOT living for you. I am living for me.” That statement comes from healing. I am doing life ON MY OWN TERMS NOW.

I want this for you. True.

And I pray you find the magic that can help you do it for you. Amen.

I appreciate men who stood with and helped me:
The Catalyst, Dr Olusola Lanre
Leke Alder
Poju Oyemade
Innocent Usar
Praise Fowowe &
of course, my Dad (who took all the bullets and bore the disrespect of “not raising me well enough”)

Many thanks to IZEFUA EHRABOH too; the only one who really knows the whole story “outside” my team.

Only God knows what’s up. And I am grateful to God for All Things.

m a k t u b !!!

Sam Obafemi
The Octopus 🐙